Song for the Eleventh Hour

Last week, the first days of my PRT not being here, I became the most desperate kind of house wife there is. I had to do the house chores, do my copywriting jobs, do some typing for my aunt’s book, and take care of Freya. Not that I mind taking care of my own baby, but the fact that I could’t seem to do anything else beside being in my room (no internet connection and I couldn’t even open my notebook because Freya would jump on it at the first possible chance) made me a bit depressed.

It occured to me that maybe I should just drop this part-time copywriting thingy and go back to my fiction-book translation full-time. But then one day when Freya was asleep and I started cleaning up our room I laid my eyes on a book, one that I started to read a couple of months ago but never really had the chance to finish: Nice Girls Don’t Get Rich.

Inside I found my scribblings, as part of the exercise, of which one of them was about how I envisioned my “ideal” life. Then I remembered the reason WHY I’m willing to do all these things I’m doing, like giving up designing and be a stay-at-home mom, taking up this part-time job so I can still see my baby growing up and contribute financially.

And then the holidays came and we got the chance to go on a short getaway.  It was only to Jogjogan (Cipayung), but seeing Freya “walking” and “running” barefoot on the green grass melted all my troubles and worries away.

Yesterday she turned exactly one year old. No parties, no cakes, no festivities as one might think. Just the three of us spending time together, watching her having a good time at the playground she liked. It’s HER special day and I hope we succeeded making her day feel as special as we thought it was.

You want to know the reason WHY I’m still doing all these things? The reason is you, Freya.

So here’s a song for you, when later in life you feel what I felt. It’s an “old” song, but I know you wouldn’t mind.

When I See You Smile
Bad English

Sometimes I wonder

How I'd ever make it through,
Through this world without having you
I just wouldn't have a clue

'Cause sometimes it seems
Like this world's closing in on me
And there's no way of breaking free
And then I see you reach for me

Sometimes I wanna give up
I wanna give in
I wanna quit the fight
And then I see you, baby
And everything's all right
Everything's all right

When I see you smile
I can face the world, oh
You know I can do anything
When I see you smile
I see a ray of light, oh
I see it shining right through the rain
When I see you smile
baby when I see you smile at me
Oh yeah

Baby there's nothing
In this world that could ever do
What a touch of your hand can do
It's like nothing that I ever knew

And when the rain is falling
I can't feel it
'Cause you're here with me now
And one look at you baby
Is all I'll ever need...
Is all I'll ever need...

When I see you smile
I can face the world, oh
You know I can do anything
When I see you smile
I see a ray of light, oh
I see it shining right through the rain
When I see you smile baby
baby when I see you smile at me

Sometimes I wanna give up
I wanna give in
I wanna quit the fight
Then one look at you baby
And everything's all right
Hey, everything's all right
It's all right

When I see you smile
I can face the world, oh
You know I can do anything

When I see you smile
I see a ray of light, oh
I see it shining right through the rain, yeah

When I see you smile
Yeah I can face the world
Ooh, you know i can do anything now

When I see you smile, oh yeah
Baby when I see you smile
Smile at me

3 thoughts on “Song for the Eleventh Hour

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